My wish: a safe Christmas for our children

I ask myself why the Connecticut elementary school shooting hits me more than the mall shooting and other recent tragedies. Is it because I am a parent? And of young children? Every time I tune into the news channel, my heart breaks for the children and the families of the victims. This tragedy hits me more than any other because to me, children embody hope. I know this is cliché, but they are indeed our future. This atrocity is like wiping out hope and erasing the innocence of those who survived. Where does that, as a society, leave us?

My children trust me to keep them safe. It is my obligation, my responsibility to keep them safe. When I take them to school, I am saying, “Go, it is safe. It is good for you.” After all, we go through pains to ensure that they are safe. We make sure they have proper winter wear, with hats, gloves, scarves because we don’t want to risk them getting sick. We make sure they hold our hands when crossing the street. We make sure the car seat is properly installed. But how can I protect them in school, when I am not there? When what could hurt my child is no longer just a bully? When places and things we once thought were safe for our children are no longer so, what is our recourse? Where do we find hope in that?

A sense of dread and fear fills me every now and then. I haven’t stopped hugging and kissing my kids since they came home from school yesterday. It is sad to think that something terrible has to happen for parents to realize how lucky they are to have their kids. This tragedy has made me look at things from a different perspective—that there are greater things beyond those that may annoy, irritate or disappoint us from time to time. I thank God for my kids (even if they do get on my nerves sometimes!). Christmas songs are more meaningful. Gifts, more precious. The severity and intensity of the events will definitely make it harder for New Year’s resolutions to fade.  And that hope might seem tiny, seemingly insignificant compared to the deep sorrow many families are facing right now. But it has to start somewhere. I have to take comfort in that.